Looking back, I'd have to say that 2010 was a pretty darn good year. However, if you had asked me in April/May of 2010, I would have told you that I was having the worst year of my life. Funny how things change...
At that time I was dealing with some depression and anxiety that was making it hard for me to function. My relationship with Kevin was suffering, my relationship with friends was suffering and I was suffering. So, I sought out some help from some professionals, got prescribed some happy pills and made a few lifestyle changes and I think it was the best thing I have ever done. That happened for a reason though. I think I was at the lowest of lowest, and now being at my happiest of happiest, and most content, I am so much more self-aware of my emotions that I can quickly put myself in "check" and work on myself without letting things get out of hand.
I think for everyone, life gives you a lot of hard times to deal with, and a lot of happy times to enjoy. Last year my Grandma Hank had her leg amputated due to her Diabetes. It was a hard time for my family. But she pulled through it and she continues to improve. It was a traumatizing time for her (and for us) but something like that happened for a reason and I think part of that reason was to help in pulling my family together.
Kevin's grandfather is slowly falling victim to Alzheimer's. This past year we have been lucky enough to spend time with him and enjoy special moments with him that we will remember forever. The sad thing is that his grandfather won't remember. I hate Alzheimer's. My grandpa is in his final stages of it. Over the year my grandpa's condition has gotten progressively worse. I don't visit him often, because it is very difficult. Over Thanksgiving Kevin and I went to see him and I felt like I was going to have a nervous breakdown. It was one of the most difficult things I've had to experience in my life, thus far. We went to his room, and he didn't know anyone. Not even his own daughter - my mom. And he started shaking. And he started crying. He can no longer talk so it was just heartbreaking. Part of me wishes that I didn't go see him that day because now whenever I think of him, I have that heart-wrenching picture in my mind of him. But that visit happened for a reason and I think part of that reason was to allow me to spend as much time as possible with Kevin's grandfather while he is still (mentally) here. And I cherish that time like no other.
While some difficult things happened last year, good things also took place. Kevin and I were able to spend an amazing vacation with my family in September. It was probably one of the most special vacations I can remember. And it doesn't hurt that Kevin also proposed during that vacation - one of the most happiest moments of my life! Last year I also reconnected with some girlfriends from high school and it has been wonderful! Even though they don't live in the same town I do, we're still able to find times to meet up or stay connected. And the thing I love the most? We pick up right where we left off - like there were never nine years of being out of touch between us. Friendship is a beautiful thing, I tell ya'! :)
Kevin's and my relationship has grown tremendously over the last year. Our first year living together was a tough one. We not only had to deal with new jobs and living in a new town - but we had to deal with EACH OTHER! It was a big adjustment for us. Last year we were able to concentrate more on our relationship. We've become much closer and we tackle problems head-on. We've also made it a point to really be honest when it comes to things that our on our mind. Whether it's saying "I love you" or voicing something that may annoy us - either way, this honesty has really helped us.
And lastly, starting this blog has been a great outlet for me. I enjoy writing - and I enjoy reading. So this hobby has far exceeded my expectations. In the process I've also developed some friendships with fellow bloggers from different states and I am so thrilled about these connections. This blogging world has taken me out of my own little bubble and has shown me that there are sometimes far more serious things going on out in this world, other than my bad day. It really puts things in perspective.
As for my resolutions from last year, I pretty much met all of them - which is a major FIRST! I learned how to snowboard (however, I can't say that I really enjoy it all that much). I joined a Fantasy Football League and I actually won 3rd place! Woo hoo! I made a resolution to lose 25 pounds, but I only lost 20. I am more than pleased with that though. Those last five pounds are coming off this year and I better keep them off!
As for this year, I don't really have any resolutions. I have one goal though, and that is to get healthy. Take my vitamins, get to bed at a decent hour and exercise consistently. My goal is to make all of this a habit and a part of my every day routine.
So there you have it. Last year was the best of years and the worst of years for me. But looking back on it all now, there are reasons for everything. One of my favorite things is to see things come full circle and I believe that happened for me last year.
I hope you all have a blessed 2011 and are able to make the most of the hard times and the best of the good times.
God bless,
